Talking to a young person about sexuality is not the same when they are 4-6 as 7-9.
First big difference a child under 6 years old has not started puberty and their peer group hasn’t either.
Once over 7 years old even if that young person has not started puberty there is a very good chance that a classmate or someone that they take part in extracurriculars with is showing signs.
Prepubescent youth have not felt sexual desire. They may have felt around and made their penis or clitorus erect but most likely they did not feel an innate desire to reach orgasm.
Before the start of puberty their concerns will be more focused on peer group interactions and performance in school or extracurricular activities of choice.
When you begin talking to prepubescent youth about sexuality you want it to be simple
What different parts do people have
How do the parts work
What do the parts do
At younger ages you can stick to services differences in the genders. Once kids start asking questions you can provide more information that will help them to understand.
- Be age appropriate. When a young person asks about how a baby is made or how it got inside of a person that they know, they are not asking for information about that person’s sex life. Keep it general!
- Remind young people that if they understand their bodies, feeling and values it will life easier as they grow up.
Children under 2 are looking for connections with caregivers. They are looking to discover their bodies, not understand them in the same way an older child will.
Next children will be looking to understand difference in bodies. By 5 your young person should understand the basic physical differences between the genders assigned at birth.
By 8 your young person should understand privacy and the differences in reproductive organs. They should have a good grasp of the changes that can be expected in puberty. Even if your young person is not about to go through puberty, that does not mean that people in their social circle or school will not be.
Planned Parenthood has great body image resources.